Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
