So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
