At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
Randomize
