the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
Randomize
