Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Randomize
