were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
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