worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
I'm sorry I murdered your sperm with my alcohol saturated Olympic uterus.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
Randomize
