she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Randomize
