weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
Ikea night.
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Insert tab A into swedish slot B
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
Randomize
