definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
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