this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
Randomize