it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
