Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
Swiping left on your brother's Tinder account is possibly the worst way to learn he broke up with his girlfriend.
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
Oh man. I threw up in the first cab. Got kicked out. Roamed somewhere for awhile. Fell asleep in the back if the second cab. Woke up in my underwear on the living room floor with a frozen pizza (thawed) laying next to me
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
Randomize
