And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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