That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
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