Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
plans for tonight: dress up like pirates, drink a bottle of mad dog and watch the sorostitues across the street get naked. and yes, the mad dog part is already in play. hurry the fuck up. i look like a loser doing this alone.
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
i just wrote an ode to an enchilada dorito. i'll need that pregnancy test now please.
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Randomize
