i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
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