I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
I'm both gender and math confused
there is puke in my bra ... again
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
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