I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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