i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
Randomize
