Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
All she gave me for breakfast was raw toast. How can she expect me to eat raw toast?
You mean bread?
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
I just want to make out with him forever
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
Randomize
