yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
Randomize
