So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
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