dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
Randomize
