3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
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