I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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