I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
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