I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
