If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
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