i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
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