i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize
