I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
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