yo i stole a wine glass from the ritz but i spilled wine on my hundo dolla shirt
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
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