I saw his package. It spoke to me.
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
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