I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
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