He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
Randomize
