bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
Randomize
