so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
Randomize
