guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
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