I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
you made out with another girl for some wings
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize
