If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
Randomize
