Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
Randomize