I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
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