k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
