Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
Randomize