oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
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