I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
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