She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
I think weed is turning my hair brown
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
Randomize
