i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
Randomize
