hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
